Friday, May 10, 2013

What's sex got to do with it? The gay marriage debate continues!

This is part two in a series of blogs about gay marriage. The first is about the rights of marriage but I'll really encourage you to check out the preamble.. It explains why I won't be using the Church or Scripture to defend (although at the end I will do a Theological explanation). Be sure to check those out and stay tuned for other topics like children and gay marriage!

Maybe I should have done this post first.. It's really looking at the essence of marriage. And it's all about..


P.S. When I give my chastity talks sometimes I have the kids yell out "Sex!" beforehand. I'll say, "Oh, c'mon!  You can do better than that! Embarrass your teachers! Let's really yell it out.. Ready?" LOL They end up screaming and laughing and it totally cuts the tension. :) I love chastity talks!

So let's do the adult version here. No need to be shy.. Wherever you are, just yell out "Penis!" or scream "Vagina!" Ready? Go!

See? That wasn't so bad! Oh.. You were at Panera? They're escorting you out and you had to leave your Bacon Turkey Bravo behind? Ehh.. Sorry about that.

But really taking a look at sex can be enlightening when it comes to marriage as it is the physical union between two, mirroring the union in the relationship of marriage.

So, what is sex? Let's head back to our Oxford English Dictionary:

Now, I'm not sure how anyone could disagree with this, but sex involves a penis and a vagina. With two of the same I'm sure you can have a grand ol' time! Rubbing and.. Whatever. But ya can't have sex. 

Notice that this definition does not talk about love. Rape can include sex. And on the flip side, it doesn't matter much love is between the two, a same-sex couple cannot have sex. It is, what the French call,  impossible. 

Like the Kraft singles (see last post in the series.. Kraft Singles can't be called cheese because they lack the essence of cheese), it doesn't matter how naked two people are, how many orgasms they have, how sexy their time together is.. If there is not a penis, a vagina and penetration involved, it might be sexy, but it ain't sex, my friend. 

And this is my basic argument for why gay couples cannot be married. Marriage IS the union of a man and wife with the potential for new life between them. It doesn't matter how much love is between two women or two men, how much commitment they have for each other.. Romance and commitment does not a marriage make. It's a distinct relationship of husband and wife with the potential for new life.*

We can't deny that the penis and vagina fit together so perfectly! You cannot bring two vaginas or two penises together like you can their counterparts. Why are we so surprised then when we make the statement that the men and women who are attached to that genitalia are, in the same way, harmoniously united? Men and women, like their "sexy bits" (*wink!*), fit together in a way like no other relationship! It is distinct! And it is worth protecting. 

When we start saying that anything sexy is sex, then sex becomes anything! Our ideas about sex become blurry, our standards and expectations are lowered, and suddenly sex is no big deal. Similarly, if we start saying that any romantic, committed relationship is marriage, then marriage will be -- eh, whatever. When you have marriages that are suddenly no different, really, from any other relationship and a society that does not support it, the institution itself will crumble. 

This is important. We MUST have a society that sees the relationship between husband and wife as sacred and supports and protects it with a vengence! Our culture should surround marriage and the family as the basis of our civilization. If we don't, and the institution of marriage fails, the family will fail. The building block of our society will break down. We cannot be a strong people without strong marriages. 

Protecting marriage is protecting our way of life. 

* Someone is going to ask: well what about infertile couples!? You have a man and a woman but no potential for new life, you know! But there is a difference between not being able to reach the potential vs. removing it completely. And just like any fluke of nature, it does not contradict the entire system. Infertile couples are the exception when it comes to marriage. But every. single. same-sex couple is, by nature, sterile. It is not a comparable phenomena. 

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